I’ve been settling into this new place here on the west coast for two and a half weeks now. It’s been a roller coaster of emotions and feelings and the ride continues.  I have moments where I feel like I’ve gone down the rabbit hole in Alice in Wonderland, not knowing which way is up and where home is.  Other times I feel like I’ve landed in paradise!

One of the most profound teachings came to me through a Tantric Scholar years ago when I was a new mom and I had similar feelings of losing my self.

“In our deepest wounds and insecurities lie our greatest jewels and assets. If we are willing to mine our most vulnerable places, we discover the golden nuggets that guide our path”. I find myself today, as I write these words after many years of churning through my spiritual practice in Boulder, CO, that in this transition I have chosen a much bigger change that could only occur by leaving my home of 25 years.

I am becoming aware of how I’ve hidden my wounds in the security of home and comfort. How much I counted on this is being revealed here as I sit in the discomfort of being in the unknown, untethered. I’ve been waking in the mornings, offering a prayer of gratitude and asking for guidance to turn these deeper wounds I’ve been hiding into strengths. Here’s a prayer I’ve been doing in the mornings I thought I’d share:

Dear Goddess,

Please show me how to walk this path of sacredness not secrecy. Help me become transparent with myself and my shadows so that I may serve and offer my gifts to others with love and compassion from the highest place. As I begin this new year and new journey may I say yes to joy and fullness and I know my value and worth from head to toe. I bow deeply to the continuous teachings I receive from Lakshmi, the goddess of abundance and generosity.   My prayer is that we all find it in us to do the work of turning of turning our poison into medicine so we can overcome our fears and bring beauty and love to the world. I’m grateful to all of my teachers (including my children and husband) who show me this pathway every day!

With All My Love,

Alison

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